fuman_chica
Fishaholic
It's not a relationship...
Ahhh I Can't Believe I Found Him!
- Thread starter BettaBum873
- Start date
- Status
liz2
Fish Aficionado
I watch way too many friendsIt's not a relationship...
fuman_chica
Fishaholic
BWBettas
Bettas Eh?
it is worth defending yourself. I've had to defenc myself on here more than once and i'm still here not getting yelled at or moaned at (well i hope not, PM me if you have a problem wit me 
) so i think defending yourself is a good dea BB
Bret
) so i think defending yourself is a good dea BBBret
Synirr
"No one is a failure unless you try"
I watch way too many friendsIt's not a relationship...
Taridan
Fishaholic
BettaBum, I'm sure you think you're doinga good thing, like FumaChic thinks. You think you're trying to help the fish, that its not right we all jump on you just because you feel the need to buy betta's and then when you get overwhelmed try to find good homes for them. It's good to see you trying to find them good homes, but thats not a solution, its an escape. The solution to this would be controlling yourself. I know. Its hard, especially when you walk into walmart and see bunchs of betta's just sitting there rotting to death. Find a happy medium, one where you will have time to take care of every fish that you have, and yet still have free time to have a life. Set a limit for yourself, (I'd suggest eight or ten) and then stick to it.
It will be hard. You'll think of all the extra tanks you have at home and want to buy more. I know this might sound sort of funny, but you sound like an Addict. To Bettas. And the first step for Addicts to anything is to admit there is a problem, then take steps to fix it. After you get yourself down to only ten or so fish, Get rid of your extra tanks. That will help with the 'but I've got tanks to put them in' syndome. you may have the tanks, but it doesn't sound like you have the time. Resist the urge to think, 'oh, one more won't take up too much extra time...' because you'll start to think that about every one you see and the vicious cycle will start all over again. I'm not saying you have to get rid of the tanks forever, or even sell them... if they're the stackable kind, you could find a Very trusted friend to hold onto them for you, but you'd need to make it crystal clear to them that under no conditions are they to give you any of them for at least six months. Then if after six months you have not bought any fish, as a reward you get one tank and one fish. Take it slow. Enjoy the fish you have and stop feeling responsible for all the poor fish out there that need homes. There will always be extra fish. Your part in the problem should not be to rescue every one, but to provide good stable homes for the ones you do have.
I hope this helps you look at this in a different light instead of your gut reaction, which is probably 'they're being mean and picking on me, and dont understand!' We do understand, but you have to have to know your own limits.
It will be hard. You'll think of all the extra tanks you have at home and want to buy more. I know this might sound sort of funny, but you sound like an Addict. To Bettas. And the first step for Addicts to anything is to admit there is a problem, then take steps to fix it. After you get yourself down to only ten or so fish, Get rid of your extra tanks. That will help with the 'but I've got tanks to put them in' syndome. you may have the tanks, but it doesn't sound like you have the time. Resist the urge to think, 'oh, one more won't take up too much extra time...' because you'll start to think that about every one you see and the vicious cycle will start all over again. I'm not saying you have to get rid of the tanks forever, or even sell them... if they're the stackable kind, you could find a Very trusted friend to hold onto them for you, but you'd need to make it crystal clear to them that under no conditions are they to give you any of them for at least six months. Then if after six months you have not bought any fish, as a reward you get one tank and one fish. Take it slow. Enjoy the fish you have and stop feeling responsible for all the poor fish out there that need homes. There will always be extra fish. Your part in the problem should not be to rescue every one, but to provide good stable homes for the ones you do have.
I hope this helps you look at this in a different light instead of your gut reaction, which is probably 'they're being mean and picking on me, and dont understand!' We do understand, but you have to have to know your own limits.
RandomWiktor
Rabid Betta Activist
Sanadi, I think that was the most reasonable statement in the whole thread. I applaud you.
I've been deliberately avoiding this thread like the plauge. I, like Fuman_Chica, have adopted some wonderful, healthy bettas from BettaBum, and did not see what all of the fuss was about. I more recently adopted a not-so-healthy betta from her like some of the other posters, though it was a problem much more easily remedied than SBD or parasites. Would I adopt again? Absolutely, because regardless of my feelings on some of the things I've heard, if a person is overwhelmed and needs to rehome fish, not adopting is just going to create a bad situation for the fish. I've adopted animals (mostly birds) from pet owners I'd like to beat over the head for poor husbandry practices - but instead of flipping out, I reminded myself that the main goal is to get the animal and give it a good home. That, I think, is most important.
Now, I have to admit, after reading MANY posts on MANY forums, I do think there is (or was) a problem here. I don't think anyone here is against helping sick fish get back on their feet and finding them new homes; that is a perfectly noble cause, and I do believe that it is how this started out - with good intentions. The issue, I think, arose with some of the past incidences involving buying bettas instead of just rehabilitating sickies, like buying and re-selling bettas from breeders who thought their fish had a life long home. Or buying pet store bettas and placing them for sale in the stock shop as though they could be breeders, when really no reputable breeder would knowingly use a pet store betta due to uncertain age, health, and genetics. A person on another forum purportedly adopted out a fish as a companion strictly since he was not breeding quality, and pictures were found of him in a breeding situation with fin injuries suggesting he'd been fighting with the female. And as Synirr said, she's not recieved payment for one of her fish. So, I do not think anyone has been out of line here by stating what they've observed. Honestly, it is probably a good thing having people here giving both their support and their anger, so that people looking to buy or sell can form their own opinions.
Me? Well I don't have to worry about selling or adopting out my fish, because my rescue is a permenant sanctuary, not a shelter, so I have no qualms with driving on over to adopt bettas who need homes. I love each and every fish I've adopted so far, and if I have the space and there is a need to place, I'll always welcome with open arms and clean aquariums. Though, BettaBum, I'm sorry to say that I can't adopt a female like I'd asked earlier The betta I was supposed to be "pet-sitting" just became a permenant resident because his owner is moving out of state and decided she didn't want the hassle of bringing him along. So he's going to be the new "roommate" in the tank.
I've been deliberately avoiding this thread like the plauge. I, like Fuman_Chica, have adopted some wonderful, healthy bettas from BettaBum, and did not see what all of the fuss was about. I more recently adopted a not-so-healthy betta from her like some of the other posters, though it was a problem much more easily remedied than SBD or parasites. Would I adopt again? Absolutely, because regardless of my feelings on some of the things I've heard, if a person is overwhelmed and needs to rehome fish, not adopting is just going to create a bad situation for the fish. I've adopted animals (mostly birds) from pet owners I'd like to beat over the head for poor husbandry practices - but instead of flipping out, I reminded myself that the main goal is to get the animal and give it a good home. That, I think, is most important.
Now, I have to admit, after reading MANY posts on MANY forums, I do think there is (or was) a problem here. I don't think anyone here is against helping sick fish get back on their feet and finding them new homes; that is a perfectly noble cause, and I do believe that it is how this started out - with good intentions. The issue, I think, arose with some of the past incidences involving buying bettas instead of just rehabilitating sickies, like buying and re-selling bettas from breeders who thought their fish had a life long home. Or buying pet store bettas and placing them for sale in the stock shop as though they could be breeders, when really no reputable breeder would knowingly use a pet store betta due to uncertain age, health, and genetics. A person on another forum purportedly adopted out a fish as a companion strictly since he was not breeding quality, and pictures were found of him in a breeding situation with fin injuries suggesting he'd been fighting with the female. And as Synirr said, she's not recieved payment for one of her fish. So, I do not think anyone has been out of line here by stating what they've observed. Honestly, it is probably a good thing having people here giving both their support and their anger, so that people looking to buy or sell can form their own opinions.
Me? Well I don't have to worry about selling or adopting out my fish, because my rescue is a permenant sanctuary, not a shelter, so I have no qualms with driving on over to adopt bettas who need homes. I love each and every fish I've adopted so far, and if I have the space and there is a need to place, I'll always welcome with open arms and clean aquariums. Though, BettaBum, I'm sorry to say that I can't adopt a female like I'd asked earlier
The betta I was supposed to be "pet-sitting" just became a permenant resident because his owner is moving out of state and decided she didn't want the hassle of bringing him along. So he's going to be the new "roommate" in the tank.Taridan
Fishaholic
Synirr
"No one is a failure unless you try"
Hey now, there is nothing funny about betta addiction... it's a horrible disease for which there is no true cure
To be fair, it was just one. She decided against getting the others.
LadyMacca1
Fish Crazy
Wisperian
Where's Nemo :o
Lol we should like booby trap the places she gets her bettas from. "No Betta Bum Allowed." Then they like open a hole in the ground where she falls in and all the bettas she's ever had comes back to haunt her
LadyMacca1
Fish Crazy
BWBettas
Bettas Eh?
Pfft. good idea probably not too practical lol!
Bret
probably not too practical lol!Bret
fuman_chica
Fishaholic
And you guys are telling her to grow up.
BettaBum873
Fishaholic
And you guys are telling her to grow up.
This whole thread is getting pretty pointless...
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