Active .vs. Non active members?

[PheonixKingZ]

and PheonixKingZ has more posts than I do..and I've been here about 7 years and I'm a mod.

That is a good point. I guess being mature enough to be a Mod doesn’t always mean having the most posts?

 

[PheonixKingZ]

I came back for some help and thought I might stay a while. Very busy life outside of the forum, so who knows.

It is very busy, especially with this whole pandemic going on right now.

 

[kribensis12]

It is very busy, especially with this whole pandemic going on right now.

Yup. Two kiddos, wife and I work full time, involved in Church, maintaining landscaping/garden, cooking etc. I typically don't get more than 6 hours of sleep and the time I'm awake - well, I'm AWAKE.

 

[BoningKnife]

Im saddened by the reality of what these forums are now. The very idea that people might choose to experiment is treated with utter scorn, unrealistic and unbending expectations are thrust upon people. It's very much a regimented set of responses on places like this. The problem with that is our hobby is not a regimented one, im not saying stupidity or the mistreatment of fish should be acceptable. I'm just saying, a forum like this, with the power of Google searches, has a lot of power when it comes to attracting new people to our hobby which I would expect all of us would agree is for the better of all of us.
Also, a lot of fish keepers, myself included, feel no real emotional connection to there fish. Don't get me wrong I care for them above and beyond, but I do it out of my love of the hobby, the tank(s) as a whole. Sometimes it can seem like people on here care about each individual fish a bit to much. It's a fish, not your gran. Especially when said fish is a tetra or a guppy or whatever. I don't mean to be callous, just honestly I do find it slightly tedious and I doubt I'm the only person. This isn't intended to upset anybody, i used to really enjoy these forums some years ago, i was never flamed away I just became less active to the point of being entirely inactive, but from time to time I still browse occasionally, there's a lot of really knowledgeable people, a lot of amazing tanks to look at.

About ten to fifteen years ago I was an active member under a different username to which the login has escaped me. However, im going to try, I keep coming back even if it's just lurking, so let's see.

 

[communityfluvalroma]

Different strokes for different folks.

We are all different and that’s what makes this planet a beautiful place to live.

As long as they’re dedicated to the wellbeing of their fish, plants, corals, invertebrates or anything else in their tank that’s all that matters.

I truly appreciate all of the advice members of this forum have given me. I had a very warm welcome about two weeks ago and because of that, I felt it was worth hanging around.

I would say that I’m ‘actively inactive’. I spend most of my time on the forum browsing and reading threads that interest me. That’s purely down to my knowledge base compared to others on the forum. I don’t want to give the wrong advice, because in this hobby it really can mean the difference between life and death.

 

[PheonixKingZ]

Also, a lot of fish keepers, myself included, feel no real emotional connection to there fish.

Wow. I’m pretty sure a lot of people on this forum would disagree with that statement.

I for one love my fish, especially my betta. They are the one creature I can talk to (especially in this time of QT) and they seem to understand me. Unlike a friend on the phone, my fish are right there. I care for them and they care for me.

I’m very surprised that you don’t feel any connection to your fish whatsoever.

 

[FishkeeperLinz]

Im saddened by the reality of what these forums are now. The very idea that people might choose to experiment is treated with utter scorn, unrealistic and unbending expectations are thrust upon people. It's very much a regimented set of responses on places like this. The problem with that is our hobby is not a regimented one, im not saying stupidity or the mistreatment of fish should be acceptable. I'm just saying, a forum like this, with the power of Google searches, has a lot of power when it comes to attracting new people to our hobby which I would expect all of us would agree is for the better of all of us.
Also, a lot of fish keepers, myself included, feel no real emotional connection to there fish. Don't get me wrong I care for them above and beyond, but I do it out of my love of the hobby, the tank(s) as a whole. Sometimes it can seem like people on here care about each individual fish a bit to much. It's a fish, not your gran. Especially when said fish is a tetra or a guppy or whatever. I don't mean to be callous, just honestly I do find it slightly tedious and I doubt I'm the only person. This isn't intended to upset anybody, i used to really enjoy these forums some years ago, i was never flamed away I just became less active to the point of being entirely inactive, but from time to time I still browse occasionally, there's a lot of really knowledgeable people, a lot of amazing tanks to look at.

About ten to fifteen years ago I was an active member under a different username to which the login has escaped me. However, im going to try, I keep coming back even if it's just lurking, so let's see.

Maybe it's to do with experience in the hobby. Newer fishkeepers might feel a bit more connection and love for every fish - because it's theirs. I still remember getting upset when a Tetra died. Now I feel a passing regret. But more "individual" fish, I'd get a bit more attached to and form a stronger attachment to.


But if you're not attached to any fish, and more to the setup, perhaps you're less fishkeepers and more aquascaper? (Not you personally)

As for this site being regimented and treating experimenters with scorn, really? I knew one site where, if you didn't have a planted tank set up and have a single synthetic ornament in the tank you were "discouraged" and and outcast. This site, and others, seem to be much more relaxed. I suppose I'll find out personally when I revealed my plans for my smaller tank.

 

[BoningKnife]

Wow. I’m pretty sure a lot of people on this forum would disagree with that statement.

I for one love my fish, especially my betta. They are the one creature I can talk to (especially in this time of Q) and they seem to understand me. Unlike a friend on the phone, my fish are right there. I care for them and they care for me.

I’m very surprised that you don’t feel any connection to your fish whatsoever.

That is exactly what drives people away from both forums and to a lesser degree the hobby. It's why forums within our hobby have gone from booming to all but irrelevant.
Me saying I have no emotional connection to a fish is not a knock on the fact you do. Expecting all fishkeepers to have a personal connection with their fish and not wanting to accept that it's possible to care for the fish without loving them.
I care for my fish. I ensure their environment is both nice to look at for me and suitable for them. I'm careful with stocking, my water, all of that. That way the fish are as happy and just at there best as I can get them, which means I can get my maximum enjoyment from the tank. If one dies, without being crass, I don't care. I'm going to be trying to figure out the cause desperately because I care about the tank as a whole. I might be irked about the financial hit, but I aint gonna be mourning. That's not to say your wrong to care, not at all. Just to say it doesn't make me a worse fishkeeper than you just because I don't name my fish or have an emotional connection to them (that's not to say there haven't been the occasional exception to that rule, but they are exceptions.)

 

[PheonixKingZ]

Are you seriously telling me you don’t name specific fish? (Like betta fish that you actually tell apart?)

 

[BoningKnife]

Nope haha. The only exception was a channa blehri that I was particularly fond of. 'Nasty Old Geezer'. I've had plenty of individual fish, in fact they are mostly what I lean toward. I can obviously tell them apart, learn there little behavioural differences and stuff. I'm fascinated watching them. I'm not a monster, just fish don't tend to make it into my heart haha.

 

[PheonixKingZ]

I guess different people have different opinions. Hope I didn’t offend you.

 

[Essjay]

I don't name my fish either. My betta is usually referred to as "the betta" or sometimes "Mr Fish". If he hadn't already been given a name by a previous owner, I'd probably call the cat "the cat"

 

[PheonixKingZ]

I like Mr.Fish, very original.

 

[BoningKnife]

Not at all. Never offended and also never intend to cause any.
Hahaha, I regularly refer to my son as 'the boy'.

 

[trash.binh91]

Not at all. Never offended and also never intend to cause any.
Hahaha, I regularly refer to my son as 'the boy'.

I totally understand what you mean. My first few fish, they all had names because I HAD a connection to them. My gudgeons and minnows, they don't have names. I care for the same but I still don't give them names because it just doesn't click. My bettas, though, there was that click when I got them so I named them. After my first fish (which has passed), the emotional connection to each fish gradually lessened. So I understand.

Does that mean that I don't love my fish? No, I consider them as my "children" and I will do the best to take care of them with what I can do.