... my only problem was is that some people can over exaggerate to much.
1) Writing as a mod, let me just thanks to everyone in this thread. It is a charged topic, and it could have gotten ugly quick, but you guys have all shown why this is one of the best forums on the Internet by treating this subject exceptionally well. As I like to write often: we can all disagree, but so long as we all respect one another, conversations like this can happen
2) in response to the above, the issue at hand is your judgement of what constitutes exaggeration or not. You are admittedly a beginner. The advice you are being given reflects your level of experience. The idea is to give you a buffer zone so that things won't go sour quickly. To give you time to recognize and ameliorate problems before they get really out of hand and cause the death of your fish -- exactly what you are stating you want to avoid.
For example, if your cycling bacteria colony should happen to die off for any reason, a lightly stocked tank builds up ammonia much less quickly than a heavily stocked tank. An experienced fishkeeper would notice his fish showing signs of distress probably before any other symptoms would show themselves. This is nothing that can be taught over the Internet. It only comes from experience -- either hard learned when a tank goes bad or simply by having watched their fish for many hours and knowing what their fish's normal behaviors are -- again, nothing that can be taught over the Internet.
Furthermore, as with any new hobby, a lot of people when they first get interested in a hobby tend to go all out. They get into gardening and till up half the yard. They get into golf and go out and buy brand new clubs. Or, they get into fishkeeping and buy a large tank with expensive fish. The problem is that all too often, the interest in the hobby flames out.
And, unlike a patch of weeds in the yard or veggies rotting on the vine or a golf bag and clubs collecting dust in a corner of the garage -- if you burn out on fish, you have living creatures that you really are obligated to take care of, probably for quite a few years as most fish can be fairly long lived with good care. You have living creatures under your care that suffer if you decide to ignore them. And, that is something that every member of this board wants to avoid.
So, to this last point, conservative stocking is not nearly as much work as an aggressive stocking. Thereby significantly reducing your chance of burning out on the hobby, and thereby keeping the fish healthy and happy for a long time.
To sum up -- it isn't that people are necessarily exaggerating. But, trying to give you the best chance to succeed so that you will be able to have many tanks with many long-lived thriving fish. The advice is in the best interest, not only of the fish, but your best interest, too. If you look at it from that point of view, I think it will take on a very different meaning for you.