You can usually tell by the size. Females will be MUCH larger than males.
Stressed out. You drove him crazy LOL.
Now that I think about it, when I kept black skirts the bigger ones (females) were usually darker than the males.
I would take the aggressive serpa back to the lfs. Your choice if you want more or not, but I would get rid of the bully.
If your wanting more serpas and the one you have is bullying your fish, take him back to the store and ask for a trade. Tell them your going to buy some more to make a school and they will probably give you a trade-in. That way you get the school of serpas and you won't have the bully anymore. I had to do that with my black skirts.
Try rearranging the decorations/plants. sometimes that will calm down a bully fish.