Issues for the aging hobbyists to address

[Back in the fold]

This is something I’ve thought about a lot since my wife passed away in February . Any of us can go at any time for any reason . I run almost every day and “ think “ I’m healthy but cancer or anything could be lurking undetected . I’m as weak as a cat in my arms . I can’t do even one push-up without tremendous effort and doing my water changes now I use a smaller bucket and make more trips . I’m going to try to keep up with the hobby for as long as I can but the day I can’t keep up may come upon me as a complete surprise . Now about the fish . What happens to them ? My best friend had a fishroom crammed with dozens and dozens of killifish aquariums and containers , all full , when he died eight years ago at age 62 . I don’t know what his wife did with them and don’t want to know but I think it’s a safe bet that , unbeknownst to us , when our time comes , our fish might just get unceremoniously flushed down the toilet . Bearing that thought in mind I plan to slowly scale back but still keep one small easily managed aquarium for my personal satisfaction .

 

[JuiceBox52]

I don’t know what his wife did with them and don’t want to know but I think it’s a safe bet that , unbeknownst to us , when our time comes , our fish might just get unceremoniously flushed down the toilet .

This is why I made my family promise they would either care for them, find a suitable home, or take them to the lfs for rehoming.

 

[GaryE]

Legacy fish... frankly, their chances are small unless the family cares for them. Most of the time when I've helped break up fishrooms, there was nothing alive when we got there. They come after the loss, the funeral etc, and most families let them die without planning to. A fishroom is stamped with the fishkeeper's personality, and some people don't want to enter it til they have to.

In an online community, people stop posting and we often don't know their fate.

But if you're reading this, you're still alive, and while you may be old, there's nothing wrong with planning for getting older and keeping enough strength and health and vision to keep going. We can see our personal tank as 10% full or 90% empty, but we can still do our water changes and fix that for now.

Find ways to move beyond buckets. Make your set ups as ergonomic as you can figure out. We're all bright people here (&^&^ geniuses, really) and if we put our minds to it, we can find solutions. We shouldn't be passive about it. It's an activity, after all. Aquarium keeping is a pleasure, and is less hard work than gardening, for example. Many people have lovely gardens well into their 80s.

We all, quite frankly, want to keep our minds alive and sharp, and that involves becoming lifelong learners. There is no limit to what you can learn from this hobby. It's good for you to push.

When I played sports, I worked out to be better at it. Now my goals are more modest sounding, but I need to be active to make them real. I need to walk, to keep weight off, to target muscle areas to keep them working, to read, discuss fish and engage in the world - all maybe to keep fish and to be able to live my life as long and as well as I can. I died twice as a kid and was brought back by emergency doctors, and palm reading says I died at 44. Maybe I get to double that and be killed while discovering a freshwater leaping swordfish. Who knows?

I propose we soldier on and hope our luck is good, but use our noggins to raise our luck level.

 

[gwand]

I look forward to the next decade or two on the TFF despite the fact that one or more of us will cross over to the Great Beyond.

 

[Innesfan]

I look forward to the next decade or two on the TFF despite the fact that one or more of us will cross over to the Great Beyond.

Nope. They are gonna have a pill for everything any minute now.

But if they let us down, I have a cousin who is a few years younger and we've been fish buddies since childhood. We've agreed to jump to the rescue if either of us passes on...or forgets to take that pill they're coming up with.

 

[GaryE]

Another thought is that the fountain of youth could show up in one of your water changes, just at random. It's a key reason why you shouldn't skip them.

 

[Oldspartan]

As a nod to my age, I designed the dining room to fish room build to be as labor free as possible. I think it is as efficient as I can make it. The problem is the MTS virus we caught. The disease has resulted in tanks in my office, Linda's she room, the living room and our bedroom. In hindsight these are not great moves. Although they do not pose any issues now, they surely will in the future. So, while I face the idea we will be unable to maintain these tanks at some later point I will wait for that later point to hit me on the head.

We are mid 70's and if I am honest, our mobility, strength and endurance are declining. Despite very active lifestyles the decline is accelerating. I have especially noticed it over the past 3 to 4 years.

So with that thought in mind -- We will soldier on until we cannot. My hope is that we recognize the cannot point before it forces us to recognize it.

 

[GaryE]

So, while I face the idea we will be unable to maintain these tanks at some later point I will wait for that later point to hit me on the head.
So with that thought in mind -- We will soldier on until we cannot. My hope is that we recognize the cannot point before it forces us to recognize it.

That's key to me, and very well said. I've had the advantage of being part of a fishkeeping culture, via my past clubs. I've known a few people who got blindsided by bad luck, often when young. Most recognized what was happening, faced up to it and acted accordingly. Extreme age becomes a tactical retreat from many pleasures, in order to keep them from becoming burdens.

Whatever happens to the lot of us, it should be faced with respect for the living things we share our space with, and that we have put in a position where we are responsible for them. When I moved, a solid distance in the dead of a Canadian winter, I knew many of my longterm fish projects were over. The fish would never have survived the trip, and it would have been cruel to try. But as a member of a fishkeeping community, I was able to find people I trusted to give them to, so they could live on in excellent conditions.

If you recently joined the hobby, it's harder. You have a harder time finding that community that carries on. But it's well worth it. It's a bit like TFF, live. We're a mighty different bunch of people, and face to face, we might drive each other nuts with our different philosophies, values and ambitions. We're in significantly different societies in different countries, climates, and day to day realities, but we seem to get along just fine. If we stick to fish (sometimes) we have common ground, and if you can locate an on the ground, local version of the forum, you have someone to downsize to when you need to.

We can't change our bodies, but we can at least adapt at the level of how we do things. I suspect most of us will have no choice there, and we'll manage it.

 

[WhistlingBadger]

I’m doing fine as an aging fish keeper if I could just remember where I put the *#+@ net!! And has anybody seen my test kit???

 

[Essjay]

As I mentioned in another thread, I have aches and pains at almost 72. So far moving round the house and water changes haven't been a problem but they could well become an issue before long. Walking outdoors is a different matter though. I've suffered intermittent back pain since I was in my 30s so I'm used to coping with that. My osteopath thought I had arthritis in my hip last year until I twisted on that leg, there was a sound like tearing fabric and the pain went away.

 

[Lateral Line]

In 1997, I met a Danish girl in a car park in Santiago, Chilè, Nice, I thought. We traveled together for a couple of months through Bolivia, Peru and Ecuador until we reached her "end point" in Quito and had to fly home to Denmark. I flew to the Galapagos Islands for a few weeks, then back to my house in Hampshire. A letter from the girl was there, inviting me to Denmark. We traveled between our respective countries for a few months, but eventually decided we should live together. Her little rented flat or my 3 bed roomed house? She was uncomfortable moving abroad, away from her family. Simple choice, I move to Denmark, drop all my aquatic plans, get rid of my house, my tanks, filters, big bag of filter wool..., or end my relationship with the girl. Hey, I knew it wouldn't take me long to get some tanks going again. All my kit went at a sale organized through my aquarist society, and I stuffed the few things I thought I would like to keep, like my aquarist books, (numerous), into a rented van and drove over. (It was easier then, there was a car ferry running from Harwich to Esberg, but I don't think that line exists now.) Shock, horror, Denmark is fishkeeping void. Well, unless you want Koi for a pond. The decades of experience and learning still exist though.

 

[GaryE]

You can be in love, live in Scandinavia and keep... killifish. I have a friend in what seems to be a healthy Danish national association for those odd little fish.

Love will find a way, but killies can weasel their ways into tanks in small spaces... Sorry, just trying to rein in my romanticism. That was a good story.

 

[Lateral Line]

I was never a big killie keeper, was a cyprinid specialist. I did have Epiplatys annulatus going for a few years in my biggest tank in the living room. Great looking little fish, lived happily with my small barbs, rasboras and danios.
Found their site. I have no idea where the place their show is being held, but easy enough to find out. If reasonable, I may take a look.

https://killi.dk/en

 

[GaryE]

I think the Scandinavian clubs work together, and my experience (limited) of them is they are very old school. They're generous, share easily and support each other. They have quite a few species in their circuit, especially the Swedes.

 

[MaloK]

In 1997, I met a Danish girl in a car park in Santiago, Chilè, Nice, I thought. We traveled together for a couple of months through Bolivia, Peru and Ecuador until we reached her "end point" in Quito and had to fly home to Denmark. I flew to the Galapagos Islands for a few weeks, then back to my house in Hampshire. A letter from the girl was there, inviting me to Denmark. We traveled between our respective countries for a few months, but eventually decided we should live together. Her little rented flat or my 3 bed roomed house? She was uncomfortable moving abroad, away from her family. Simple choice, I move to Denmark, drop all my aquatic plans, get rid of my house, my tanks, filters, big bag of filter wool..., or end my relationship with the girl. Hey, I knew it wouldn't take me long to get some tanks going again. All my kit went at a sale organized through my aquarist society, and I stuffed the few things I thought I would like to keep, like my aquarist books, (numerous), into a rented van and drove over. (It was easier then, there was a car ferry running from Harwich to Esberg, but I don't think that line exists now.) Shock, horror, Denmark is fishkeeping void. Well, unless you want Koi for a pond. The decades of experience and learning still exist though.

At this point she would have to dress as a mermaid at least twice a year.

Loll.