Here is my battle plan:
75% to 90% water change in new tank
Recondition water
Skip Ph buffering lets see if my PH is stable after tank cycles. maybe larger tank will keep PH stable.
Re-starting tank cycle with Tetra SafeStart Plus ( I have used filter media sitting in there now )
adding aquarium salts to get my TDS to between 100-150ppm, After I populate I will lock the TDS at that #
Waiting until approx April to repopulate with legacy tank family ( will start with 1 or 2 fish ) see how it goes. If I see signs of death, out they go.
Will wait another week with alive healthy fish Will start slowly moving family members from my old tank.
how does that sound?
Questions. What will my chemistry show that my tank is properly cycling? what ## should I be going up or down?
No, this is not going to work. If you intend soft water fish such as neon tetras mentioned, you want the TDS as low or close to zero as possible. And you do not want any "buffering" nonsense. The fish store is leading you astray, and to dead fish again.
Now, some comment on the pH issue. Every aquarium has its own unique biological system that will establish over a few months. The GH, KH and pH of the source water are primarily responsible for this, but there are also other factors such as fish load, plants, CO2 from the breakdown of organics, etc. The aquarium is a very artificial environment, but the laws of the natural world respecting water chemistry and biology will still completely govern the system. During the first few months, the system will be more fluctating, again depending upon the initial factors. As it ages it will stabilize. Regular (meaning once each week) significant (meaning 50-70% of the tank volume) water changes along with not overstocking or inappropriately stocking and not overfeeding the fish, will establish stability. Leave it alone. Select fish suited to your water parameters (primarily GH, also pH).
I don't know if parameters were posted earlier in this thread, but we need to know the GH, KH and pH of the source (tap) water on its own. Run some fresh water at the tap and test this if you have these tests, or track down the website of your municipal water authority and see if this data is posted; or call them.
When testing pH of tap water you need to let it sit 24 hours before testing. Not needed with aquarium water, just for pH of tap water.
EDIT. Forgot this previously...your method of introducing new fish is spot on.