Regarding this killer tank of yours, can we get a picture of it, and a list of what is in it?
To find out why things die in the tank, remove everything and rinse it all out under tap water, including the tank. Set the tank and filter up and let it run for a week with dechlorinator in. Then add a couple of cheap sacrificial fish.
Start adding one item to the tank and see how the fish go over a week. If they are good for a week, add another item and monitor for a week. Continue adding items (one at a time) until the fish act badly or die. The last item you add is the problem.
When you add gravel, just add a thin layer (1/2 inch maximum), just enough to cover the bottom of the tank so you can't see the glass base.
You will have to monitor ammonia and nitrite levels during this time and do big water changes to keep them under control, but the above is how you work out what is killing the fish.