When a Blessing Becomes A Curse

[gwand]

When I retired in 2021, I lost 35 pounds on a diet and have kept it off since then. I go to the gym almost every day and do 20 minutes of yoga as well. I feel better now than I did at 55. I’ve come along way. I had triple bypass at the age of 45 and then two coronary stents placed six years later. So getting in shape was imperative for me. I have a strong family history of heart disease. I am the longest lived of all the men in my family over the last three generations who have had this particular heart problem. I am a very strong advocate for a daily yoga routine in terms of joint and muscle mobility, as well as enhanced sense of well-being. If you haven’t tried it I highly recommend it. Start off slow and if you can afford it, use an instructor to get you started.

 

[Alice B]

I have been keeping fish now for 24 years. When I started at age 51 despite being 140 lbs and 5'5" tall I could fill a pair of 5 gal. buckets with water and carry one in each hand the length of the house from a bathroom out to the screen terrace. I also used my bathroom as fish central for doing water changes. This involved 32 and 20 gal Rubbermaid garbage cans and a few 5 gal. buckets. The 5s were normally ppicked up and dumped into the buggers cans being empied with a pump.

Today I do not carry filled 5 gal buckets anythwere. When I am ready to dump the water from one into the bigger can I actually use a specimen box to scoop out about half before I life the rest and dump it in.

Over the years I ramped up tank numbers. So I was getting plenty of exercise. I can tell you one cannot stave off old age in terms of strength. Of course there are some exceptions on both sides of this.

Today I am a couple of inches shorter and pounds lighter. Gravity is not your friend. I am backing out of the hobby because I cannot keep up either strength or stamina-wise.

A number of my tanks have required I use a small folding ladder to be able to do weekly maint. I have escorted both of my parents through old age and death and watched how falling became a problem. Bones get broken. I am doing away with my bigger tanks because I know sooner or later I will wind up falling off of the ladder.

I also no longer work in the woods with my chain saws. I drive my car closer to the speed limit because mu reactions times are not what they used to be. Etc. Etc. No amount of will nor dedication will keep us from physically declining as we go deeper into the "golden years."

Three things I have gleaned from it all about old age and it can be explained by three sentences.

1. And you know that you're over the hill when your mind makes a promise that your body can't fill. . Little Feat - Old folk's Boogie
2. Paraphrasing: Death is nature's way of telling us to slow down.
3. If you wake up in the morning and nothing hurts, you are probably dead.

I wake up in the morning and nothing hurts. I am 65. I am not dead. I want to start yoga but finding time is an issue. I rarely sit down. I find this probably helpful for everything but my feet, but with orthotics, I'm ok

 

[TwoTankAmin]

One of the benefits to how I did things was that most of the people who bought the fish I had spawn in my tanks wanted to get them to try to breed themselves. People who bought my fish were told that if they had questions, needed help etc. that they could always context me even is it was a year or two later. They get my Phone # and Email. I am aware of a number of people who have succeeded in doing so over the years. I have worked with a number of them over the years when they needed input. When I started in the hobby I had some great experts have a lot of patience with me. So I am willing to pay it forward.

@gwand when you retired I was 73.

@Alice B. I have a back issue that originated with fracturing my L5 clean through on both sides at age 12 and having it misdiagnosed. I now have stenosis and arthritis in it. I have ni disc under it (I think it self fused.) But, I have trouble standing or walking for extended periods and lying flat on my back for any amount of time is not possible. But the saving part of this is that when the back pain is bad I can stop it by sitting. this is the opposite of what most people experience. I have tried everything and the only option left would be back surgery and I will not do that. Fortunately a number of my tanks are under tanks and I can work on them sitting on a small rolling stool.

We all do what we have to to get by. But that doesn't mean we have to like it.

 

[Oldspartan]

More people should follow twotankamin’s example of freely passing knowledge. It is the best way to ensure continuation of skills. To often people keep their knowledge close to the vest like it is a state secret to be protected from others.

 

[Alice B]

We all do what we have to to get by. But that doesn't mean we have to like it.

I understand. i had liver and onions for dinner today. Beef. 2 days ago it was chicken liver. Trying to build up platelets. Not having enough isn't physically painful but it is dangerous, and I have arthritis in a couple of places but I tamed it down with turmeric for a number of years so not like it used to be. Fortunately my back is good and today I did my stair stepper.

 

[Panda_Monium]

I have made no secret of the fact that age has finally worn me down and the result it I am greatly reducing my tank numbers. For the past almost 17 years I have been one of the luckiest fishkeeper I know when it came to spawning Hypancustrus plecos. I cut my teeth early on with the bristlenose- common tanks varieties. They were like rabbits and I could never get out from under the insane number of fry I got. The final spawn from my oldest couple was over 100 eggs. Along the way i finally was able to acquire my most wanted pleco - zebras. I ended up buying a proven breeding group of 13 fish which began to give me two spawns a month almost immediately.

And this provided me with the way to expand. The zebras first paid me for the purchase. Then they began paying me back for all the money I had spent on everything else fish and not pleco. So like any good addict with MTS, I then used the zebra sales to finance more species- P. compta, L450. H. contradens, L173b and RB line 236. And then the pride of my groups- wild caught L173. I may have had the only WC group in the country at that time, but I am not certain. The final addition was a group of RB line SW 236.

And pretty much everything spawned. Only thr P. comptas gave me some issues and they got sold to make room for my of thos crazy B&W Hypans.

As the years passed I discovered that water had gained a lot of weight, that I had to be doing 25 hours a week of tank work as I also had a number of planted communities. When I finally crossed into my 70s 6 years ago I realized I was coming to the end of an era. I was simply having trouble keeping up with it all. My heart never wanted to stop working with the fish but my head told me not to be an idiot, you are getting too old.

So I bit the bullet and put together a few year plan to go from 20+ tanks to maybe one or two smaller ones. The first things that had to go were the breeding groups of plecos. As Long as I had them it meant many more babies.

So I began selling things. My last sale of breeders was my last acquired group- the SW 236 and about 132 assorted offspring. However, we hit a small snag. When I went to catch the SW breeders, I discovered a trapping in progress which precedes a spawn. So I called the buyer and asked what he wanted me to do. I could break them apart and send them, or I could hold on until the trapping ended and send them later. My buyer did not want a spawning interrupted, as we both knew this often means they may not try again for months, so I held onto them.


The shipping arrangement were unusual here as two buyers combined and took advantage of the 29% discount I offer if fish are picked up instead of my shipping. So the partner came and got most of the fish and he took the other gents fish and sent them to him airport to airport. They both work for airlines or had in the past. The two fish and 5 more kids were to be picked up at a later date and sent.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch (excuse the western movie metaphore) I had been buying small albino bristlenose and a few tiny super reds to help with algae in my planted tanks. I was putting twp in each of 4 tanks and the super reds also went into the biggest. My plan was to remove one if there were signs of spawning. Three days ago I discovered BN fry plasterer on the front and side glass of the 75. A the male and only LF had claimed a cave and the rest is history. Right now my best hope if that a load of amano shrimp in the tank will eat most of them. Now I have to grabs that male in the cave and get rid of it. I will segregate it and bring it to my culb meeting to sell or give away.

Next, last night I was working in the fish paces where the last vestiges of the plecos are. I have kept the wild a L173 for a bit and have stopped selling their offspring. They are too unique and valuable to let go quite yet. SInce the intital trapping above that yielded nothing I have not seen any further signs of spawning, until last night. i decided to check the cave as i saw the males movong in a way that made me suspicious. Trusty flashlight in hand I got doen on my hands and needs to see into the cave. Inside were both fish and they were vibrating whihc is haow they behave when spaning. UGH!

This orning when I checked the males was alone. But he was doing his nest to keep me from seeing for sure or not there were eggs, His behavior makes me thinks there age, but until I can acyually see them I have hope.

The absolute one thing I do not want is more pleco fry. I had to hold onto the last 30 or so SW fry because they were way to small to sell fo a few months. they are almost ready to go out and now this.

For many years every new spawn had me doing the happy fish dance. I was so lucky to have the success I did. I credit it to three things. The first is my well water. the best way I can explain it is it would appear it contain a natural fish aphrodeseac. Every species of plecos (save the P. compta) has spawned prolifically for me. The next factor is that I have been almost religeous in my maintenance and water changes now for going on 24 years. the last factor was learning how importan diet is when if comes to having healthy fish that will spawn. But the lions share of the credit should be given to the fish.

Now the most recent two spawns are not the sort of belssing they used to be, they are a curse. They are moving me in the wrong direction. I am s fish keeper who feels a that if I keep fish in a box I am entirely responsible for their lives. It is my duty to see they are properly cared for and given the best chance to groew and live long lives. It is up to me to try to get the offspring to others who want to spawn them. And I have also made rthe decision that I cannot kcontiue doing so, hence the selling of a lot of them.

So here I have arrived at a point where what I used to consider a blessing has now turned into a curse. I do not want or need more babies and I will not euthanize them and U cannot sell or even give them away until they get big enough to be most likely to survive. My usualy rule has been a minimum size of 1.5 inches TL and a minimum age of 6 months for many. the L173 are very slow frowers and need well over a year before I will offer them.

*SIGH*
Old age sucks.

Though I am not of your wise life length in years, I absolutely relate to the way you feel!!
After an incredibly incompetent beginning in my journey back to keeping "a few fish" to keep me occupied while awaiting finalisation of a career/ workplace injury situation, I have done an incredible job in making amends for the fish keeping disasters of last year. My panda corydoras are so happy and spoiled that they spawn, almost without fail, every 4 days. That, in itself, is a beautiful gift.
The ongoing work load and increase from 1 tank to 5 (to accommodate different stages of growth and space requirements) has turned out into just as much a full time job as it took to get my tanks and fish and tanks healthy and ich-free.
So Much for being able to relax while observing my nutty but also incredibly intelligent (yep - they're not the dumb critters most people think they are!) Panda corys while they get along with their everyday activities.....
I added another rod for my back when I introduced 6 peppered corydoras to the tank. (Other than 5 pandas, the only other residents are my 5 kuhli loaches). The peppered corys are So Happy that every day is a good day to spawn!
So much so that, While my tank was half empty yesterday for a monthly deep clean (non- planted tank with faux plants that need a good scrub, and sand which needs to be stirred up so I can remove excess surface grime with a fine net - because I cannot for the life of me get the hang of vacuuming it without sucking up all the sand!), my peppered corys spawned all over the place AFTER I had just harvested the heap of eggs which were already there!
And I watched as 27 of the just-harvested over 100 eggs decided to hatch immediately!
Here's where the blessing becomes the curse.....
I have no room to raise the peppered babies, or the rest of the first eggs, or the 100 or more Newly laid and harvested eggs...
What to do??? My brain asked in despair.
Well. A lovely couple came today to buy 10 panda corys, and I had already offered to give them some young peppered corys as a bonus. They were surprised but happy to take ALL of the newly hatched and harvested eggs to see how they go hatching and raising them. I have no doubts that all of the eggs will hatch and the fry will thrive because they are from really healthy, hardy parents.
And it's not as if the peppered corys aren't already busy making more babies.
As are my panda corys.
Also, my kuhlis have decided this spawning business is a bit of fun for them too, so why not just fill this lovely clean tank with snowy goop again tonight! GAAAHHH! And so the hard work continues....
@TwoTankAmin I'm tired too!!!!

 

[TwoTankAmin]

I sold off all; of my pleco breeding groups and all their offspring with one exception. I still have my wild caught group of L173. I recently had a spawn and I have two grow tanks holding about 37 offspring in total. But I am now down to only 12 tanks one of which hold only a few assassin snails and a ton of frogbit. Also, I closed down one of my two 6 foot tanks. I have also kept more smaller tanks and shut down the bigger ones.

Some of the other tanks are a departure form my habit of overstocking and there are now a few understocked tanks, I habe 10 cw111 corys in a 20L with a few plants but the r40Bs, the 50 and a 75 are empty and for sale. What I have left is a 5.5, a 15, a 20L, a 25, 2 x 29, 3 x 33L a 40L an in-wall 75 and a 125.

The downside is I have gone from weekly water changes and maint. to about 3 times/month. I am not very far from my 78th birthday. But to quote my fav band from their song Old Folks Boogie:

"So you know, that you're over the hill
When your mind makes a promise that your body can't fill'"

I am past that stage for sure.

(edited to fix typos)

 

[Panda_Monium]

One of the benefits to how I did things was that most of the people who bought the fish I had spawn in my tanks wanted to get them to try to breed themselves. People who bought my fish were told that if they had questions, needed help etc. that they could always context me even is it was a year or two later. They get my Phone # and Email. I am aware of a number of people who have succeeded in doing so over the years. I have worked with a number of them over the years when they needed input. When I started in the hobby I had some great experts have a lot of patience with me. So I am willing to pay it forward.

@gwand when you retired I was 73.

@Alice B. I have a back issue that originated with fracturing my L5 clean through on both sides at age 12 and having it misdiagnosed. I now have stenosis and arthritis in it. I have ni disc under it (I think it self fused.) But, I have trouble standing or walking for extended periods and lying flat on my back for any amount of time is not possible. But the saving part of this is that when the back pain is bad I can stop it by sitting. this is the opposite of what most people experience. I have tried everything and the only option left would be back surgery and I will not do that. Fortunately a number of my tanks are under tanks and I can work on them sitting on a small rolling stool.

We all do what we have to to get by. But that doesn't mean we have to like it.

@Alice B I am relatively young at 57 but I am classified as >33% TPD due to 4 bulged discs - L3, L4,L5 & S1. I broke me in 2008 because "Superwoman" didn't let anything stop herself from working dayum hard including working 7 days/ week in 3 different jobs, including the building industry. Then I couldn't work for 7 years until I broke the medication cycle.
Then I rebuilt my career one day at a time in finance admin roles over 6 years. Then i was broken again psychologically (still fighting for income support from that, but Meh! That's just semantics. I won't work in that environment again).
I'm replying to your statement about gaining relief by sitting. That happens for you because you are actually opening up the compressed bones in your lower back.
It is unusual because doctors do not understand that is what's happening! They think, if you have a severe lower back injury, there's no way you should be able to bend over and touch your toes (like I do to get relief), or sit. Noooooo. That's Not Right! If you can do that, there's nothing wrong with your back.... I'm here to say that it is perfectly logical to find relief this way - or at least ease the pain well enough to do what you must do.
I can lie in my back and sides but not on my stomach - because that causes my back to arch and compresses all those un-cushioned bones together. Which is agonising.
So congratulations to you for finding what works for you!!!
Personally, when doing water changes etc, I'm aware of the price I will pay for doing it, but I fill my big bucket with 5.3 gallons of water to treat before telling my tanks because my mind Refuses to let my body tell me what i can or cannot do! The after-pain has been totally worth it because my arms and stomach muscles have benefited greatly - my back might be ruined but my arms and stomach are still strong. I have a sneaking suspicion that, if you were to think about it, yours are still stringer than the average person your age too.
You may only feel half as strong as you used to, but your probably half stronger than a lot of people!! Use it while you've got it!

 

[Alice B]

I have a catfish tank that has sand on the bottom so I can't use my python hose for water changes. And I have a maxi-jet 1200 powerhead clamped to a piece of siphon hose with a t valve at the end so that the water doesn't come straight out hose but is divided and doesn't disturb sand. I do have to carry buckets but I do not have to lift and pour and that is a plus.
Rest of my tanks get a python water change.

 

[TwoTankAmin]

My back issues started when I was 12. I managed to injure my back in a way not diagnosed. About 35 year later I was having back issues =. I did not want to consider a surgical answer so I went to a sports medicine person. After proper imaging it was discovered that in the incident at age 12 I had fractured the L5 clean through on both sides

Time had then caused there to be stenosis in the spine as it went through the L5. We tried Anti-inflammatory medications which were no help and then pain shots done using a fluoroscope. The first one helped for about a week and the pain came back, The second try did not even do that much. So I finally went to see the orthopedist in my medical group.

He said the only solution was back surgery which i did not want. He also told me that it appeared that the disk was gone. He told me that it might have to be fused to fix it but sometime the vertebrae would self fuse. He said there was know way to tell from imaging if that was the case they would have to do the surgery fix the gnarled L5 and stenosis. If they had to fuse it that would make the recovery much longer and more painful. As long as I could stop the pain by sitting I decided to live with it.

The biggest issue was sleeping. Often I would get up during the night to go to the bathroom and when I returned to bed the back pain got bad. My solution is that I now take a Percocet 3 nights a week. I have never increased the dosage nor the frequency of using it. I do not use this med any other time except those 3 nights.

A while back I started to have less pain and fewer incidents of pain. I figured maybe the vertebrae had self fused. Unfortunately, this did not last and I am again having more regular back pain. But I am still not willing to have back surgery. The recovery and the risks of something going wrong scare me more than the pain.

Of the people I know who have had back surgery, 9/10 tell me not to do it if I can possibly avoid it. The 10th person telss me it fixed their issues and they were now pain free.