Pairing my bettas

[Auratus]

Ya, I know what you mean.

I've been chating with slamster almost everyday outside of the forum and he has been asking A LOT of questions so I know he's not going to rush it

 

[shrks1fan]

Jac, it's very obvious how much you care for fish and animals in general, VERY OBVIOUS, hehe. But the way you jump on people sometimes is only going to make people become defensive and not listen to what good information you have for them, it's better to be more gentle and understanding then to just rush at them and say RESEARCH MORE! If you don't come off as being rude then people will listen to what you have to say and hopefully take it to heart and not make mistakes. But if you continue to tell people the way you have been (that comes off as rude) then the people will only ignore you and not take your advise and possibly make the mistakes you are trying so hard to keep them from making. So in the interest of the animals/fish you are trying to protect, work on how you respond to people. The book "How to win Friends and Influence People" would be a very good read for you It would help you understand how the way you approach people could either help your case or hinder it. (right now you're hindering it). I hope that helps to explain to you why people react to you the way they have been here.

Linda
http/www.pet-emporium.com/files
http/www.cooking-fanatics.com/files

 

[jacblades]

The book "How to win Friends and Influence People" would be a very good read for you

gosh linda-i love how you insult me and then put a smiley after it...

i know people think im harsh but it gets their attention. some people dont want to listen whether you are "rude" or if you are "nice" so i dont really think it matters. slamster-im not saying you werent listening to me. im just talking about people in general. linda you know as well as i that lots of research is the first step. why should i not point that out first?

anyways this is only the internet, im just pressing keys on a keyboard. lighten up.

 

[Auratus]

some people dont want to listen whether you are "rude" or if you are "nice" so i dont really think it matters

I know some people on the forum don't listen but for the majority, when someone asks a question I'm sure they want to listen to the answer. That's the whole point of a question I think...

 

[rollntider]

omg if i do this it is going to be my first breed i donot want to spend 50 on a fish over the internet! i am doing research I still have to sell all of my guppie before i can breed bettas geeze don't get all pissy

I am not sure if it was directed at me, but I had assumed you were jumping in right away, my appologies.

 

[slamster17]

its ok u both just kinda ticked me off

 

[jacblades]

I know some people on the forum don't listen but for the majority, when someone asks a question I'm sure they want to listen to the answer. That's the whole point of a question I think...

thats what i think too but too many itmes it is not so... some people just want one answer and when they dont get it, they get mad

 

[Auratus]

Lol, I've done that a few times

 

[tekknocolor]

Can't we all just get along (maybe a hug and kiss to make up)

J/K

I think slamster is doing the right thing about asking

But I also think a lot of the responses were good, even if someone did get offended. Very passionate answers to the breeding question that I think won't be taken lightly because it did contain great information. Passion is what drives us to do the things we do or say the things we say... (I hope)

Anyway, I think this was an excellent thread with a LOT of personality.

I learned something new today

So, I guess everyone walks away learning something YAY!

--Leigh Ann

 

[shrks1fan]

The book "How to win Friends and Influence People" would be a very good read for you

gosh linda-i love how you insult me and then put a smiley after it...

i know people think im harsh but it gets their attention. some people dont want to listen whether you are "rude" or if you are "nice" so i dont really think it matters. slamster-im not saying you werent listening to me. im just talking about people in general. linda you know as well as i that lots of research is the first step. why should i not point that out first?

anyways this is only the internet, im just pressing keys on a keyboard. lighten up.

Jac, I was in no way insulting you, I was trying to help you understand why people take your advise the way they do. I was trying to help you find a better way to get your point across so you CAN help those fish and animals you are trying to help by informing their owners how to properly take care of them. If you truely want people to take your advise, you need to tell them in a way that they are willing to listen and heed the advise, otherwise you're just wasting your time and aren't going to help those animals. The smilies were to show that I wasn't attacking you that I was trying to give you some advise (in other words, I was trying to be friendly).

I was serious about the book, I wasn't being insulting, that book has helped me and thousands of other people get the things they want in life. You want people to treat animals properly and you want to be able to help them do that, but the way you go about it sometimes doesn't do any good, so you're not getting what YOU want.

I guess you just like dishing out the advise rather than taking any. <shrug>

Linda

p.s. if anyone else thinks I was being insulting in my post then please tell me, but I seriously don't think I was.

 

[jacblades]

actually i have read books like that (not that specific one) but i dont care for them. i like having friends instead of "winning" them. im very open to advice if it is true advice and not insults...just because you act sympathetic and try to compliment me doesnt mean im not going to notice the insult you stuck in there. i know thats one of those things they teach you in those books. "if youre going to say something mean, then say something nice too." been there. read that.

sorry for hijacking though.

 

[wuvmybetta]

anyways this is only the internet, im just pressing keys on a keyboard. lighten up.

I'm not butting in because I ya both. But omg'sh, I almost choked on my root beer when I read that line

 

[jacblades]

kind of like the quote you used to have on your sig by dave chapelle, kelly.

wait...youre not kelly anymore...

 

[shrks1fan]

actually i have read books like that (not that specific one) but i dont care for them. i like having friends instead of "winning" them. im very open to advice if it is true advice and not insults...just because you act sympathetic and try to compliment me doesnt mean im not going to notice the insult you stuck in there. i know thats one of those things they teach you in those books. "if youre going to say something mean, then say something nice too." been there. read that.

sorry for hijacking though.

Well my intent wasn't to insult you, if you took it that way then I apologize for not putting it differently so you wouldn't have taken it that way. I was just trying to help all the people you are trying to help so they'll actually take your advise. (because it is good advise usually).

Trust me, if I wanted to insult you, I would have just done it, not tried slipping it in like you're accusing me of, Lol.

Anyway, I'm done, don't take my advise, it's only going to hurt the people you claim to be trying to help.

Linda

 

[slamster17]

she has a really good point. had you not told me forcefully hat to do but suggested it i don't think we would be arguing or lecturing each other right now