Washing sand is annoying i agree but I totally disagree with plants not liking sand! ALL of my rooting plants (as in I have floating ones too...) Have made an extensive root system undernieth my sand. A plant and a bit of water will crack a gravel sidewalk, if it can't get past some sand, then something is dearly upset with the world. I also find it easier to plant in sand as well, even the floaty annoying plants (i figure because more surface area in contact with plant vs gravel) Anaerobic pockets can be avoided by not having deep sand (or just having plants) (and fish to move the sand)
When picking up fish... Think of thier natural habbitat. What comes to mind in the sub is plants, mud, sand, and not gravel. I welcome anyone to find gravel based freashwater lakes and rivers, and then tell me the types of aquarium fish that come from them.
And I'm not sure about snails, but I was always under the impression that they prefered sand (sleeping on a nail bed with 10000 nails, vs 1 nail)
Now that being said, you have to just be careful that you dont pick up coral sand and expect to keep a low ph. Dont pick up black iron slag, and expect a soft sand, dont expect the range of colours that painted gravel comes in (although they make neon colours for reptiles but i dont know how that works in aquariums) And of course dont expect the lfs sand to be cheap. (I got pool filter sand (Silica) playsand works too for less then $10cnd ($6usd due to Canadian stuff being way overpriced) Cleaning is a task, and change is hard for some.