Many of the small tetras are similaly marked, but a deeper body and noticeably wider when viewed from above is a good sign that you are looking at a female. However, in reasonable conditions, a lot of these fish are free spawners, so the females never really fill with eggs and can look just as slim as males.
The circling with erect fins and "flashing" are typical courtship/breeding behaviour patterns, particulaly if one of the fish is doing the majority of the circling, (male). Be aware also that 2 males will on occasion, display to each other to try to raise their staus in the pecking order, in this case, both the fish tend to be very actively displaying.