Convincing The 'ol Parental Units!

Shovelman · Jul 8, 2011

Hey there all! Ive got an interesting topic for the day here.

So ive been keeping fish for at LEAST 2 years now, and am getting a little tired of tank size restraints on what fish im able to keep. Ive been trying to butter my parents up to allow ME to buy a larger aquaria with MY OWN MONEY (in my family, what you want, you have to pay for yourself). Ive got a good 300$ saved up for my what would have been a planted tank redoo of my biggest tank i have, which is only a 20 tall tank... and looking on craigslist ive found tons of 55, 75, and even 90-125 gallon tanks for sale from people who probably arent dedicated enough like most of us on here (lol). But while ive been searching on craigslist, a certain 125 gallon tank, with stand, lights and so forth is on sale for 250$ (price can be bargained appearently as the post sais). And all i could think when i saw that was a nice shoal of discus or angels, or even a fire eel cruising through a nice planted tank as i sit happily in front of it. I have the money and time to take care of such a tank..but i think getting the parents consent will be a much harder task...

so. Does anyone have any points or suggestions that might be able to win my parents over?
Thanks for anyones input! (and yes i do realize a 125 gallon tank is pretty hefty, but i would have only that one tank going)

StandbySetting · Jul 8, 2011

The largest tank I've been allowed to keep was a 125L and I was ordered to get rid of it by my Mum, so at the moment I'm just using a 54 Litre, it's her house so I abide by her rules, at the end of the day if your parents say no then they mean no, you'd just have to wait until you have your own place.

Shovelman · Jul 8, 2011

yep i know what you mean, and thats wat it is like at my house too, but this is a new suggestions so there kinda open to my ideas, plus they know fish keeping is one of my main interests, so they might actually allow this to go through, i just need some good points for my side. It's nothing like were actually argueing about this lol didnt mean to make it sound that way if it does haha

fluttermoth · Jul 8, 2011

There's plenty of time ahead of you for big tanks

When I was a kid, all I had was a glass demi-john with a breeding colony of daphnia lol.

Now I'm old I've got 6 tanks!

micko · Jul 8, 2011

I'm not sure of your age but if you speak to them mannerly, tell them why exactly you want another tank, say that you've kept the tank you have now with success (if you have or not) and of course you'll have to measure up the exact length of the tank to give them a rough idea how big it will be and where it will go.
If you plan it properly they should see how mature your being about it. I'm assuming your a teenager so this should work. Being a parent of a teenager myself that's what I would ideally like to see from my oldest boy and would have a longer think about it rather than him kicking and stamping his feet, pleeding and crying is not the way to go.

fluttermoth · Jul 8, 2011

Good advice from micko there, OP

Offer to make a deal with them; that you'll wash the dishes, or work extra hard at school or something; but you'd have to at least try to do what you promised, lol

Tell them how good it will be for helpng you with your science (or something); it looks good on your CV to be able to put things like that on there, so it'll help you get a job, and budgeting (buying fish and plants) and cleaning (water changes) are all good life skills to have :look:

soybean · Jul 8, 2011

The thought of me getting a bigger tank, even though I was paying for it myself, didn't really go down well with my mum and dad and they wanted me to stay with a small one. But I carried on looking, and to freak them out a bit I was looking at 5 or 6ft tanks, even though I knew I only had room for around 3ft.

Eventually they said I could have a new tank, if I promised not to go for a 6ft one. We ended up 'compromising' on the 3ft tank I always planned to get anyway

In all seriousness, a 125 gallon tank is a pretty huge addition to their home, even if you are the one looking after it. Maybe compromise on a smaller one - which you can sell in a few years time to fund a larger one... Don't forget if you move out, you'd have to move somewhere that could house such a huge tank, or sell it on anyway - unless you could persuade your parents to look after it.

KkAaNnEe · Jul 8, 2011

Yeah, I have to agree with most of the above, people outside of the hobby cant really get their head around why we wish to go bigger, as at the end of the day, with most conventional 'pets' you don't upgrade as such lol. I think pointing out that it is a really keen interest of yours and that you're not just going to give up in a few months time is always good for peace of mind.

I would suggest you try to bargain for a 55Gal, anything bigger may be too much too handle for them, plus you have plenty of time to upgrade in the future

Lufbramatt · Jul 8, 2011

To be fair to them, a second hand tank is a potential time bomb, and 125 gals of water will take a long time to clear up if it goes! You don't know how the tank has been stored, if its been knocked, had a dodgy reseal job etc. Normally I'm all for second hand bargains, but since I've bought my own house and want a bigger tank, I wouldn't want to risk a big second hand tank in it. My little 29 was second hand but I ended up cutting out all the silicone and resealing it myself for peace of mind, a horrible job that I don't want to repeat!

Caprichoso · Jul 8, 2011

You could just ask them straight out, "If I promise to take proper care of it, can I upgrade to a bigger tank?". No sense in bs'ing them, just get right to the point. Tell them why you want to, example: you are really enjoying the hobby and would like to challenge yourself further with it, that you feel restricted with the current size of your tank, etc. You could point out to them that you've been very responsible with your tank thus far and so that wouldn't change. Show them some pictures of the fish you want and get them interested in it as well. If you see the look of "no" starting to surface on their faces, point out that you could be wanting to spend your money on booze and drugs and galavanting all over town but have instead chosen this peaceful, responsible way to spend your free time, lol...although that could backfire on you if you plan on partying a lot!

Anyway, good luck and I hope you get what you want :fish:

Shovelman · Jul 9, 2011

Thanks everyone! I appreciate all your thoughts and such! I decided im going to see if they will allow me a 75 gallon tank, as i was thinking about a 125 gallon...and it really is kinda big...lol anyways thanks!

mark2109111 · Jul 9, 2011

Always remind them that you are solely in charge... and then add the whole conversation about how 300$ could buy you a lot of weed lol (kidding of course). And end with how you planed to put this whole bigger tank into watever room you want. also if you have more than one tank offer to take down one of the smaller ones in order to compensate for the new tank you will be purchasing. :lol: