How are you feeling today?

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My bit of excitement today. It all starts years ago but I will keep it to the last 4 yrs. In 2017 WA had a state election and we got a new premier (Mark McGowan). I had been writing to the previous premier asking for help with a wrongful vro (violence restraining order) and other things that happened to me. The vro was cancelled because there were no grounds for it to be issued. Anyway, the old premier never answered any of my correspondence so I started writing to the new premier.

Fast forward to 2 weeks ago when WA was locked down and everyone had to stay home and wear a mask when out in public. Our premier (Mark McGowan) said nobody was allowed out in public without a mask. Now this is a good law and I don't have a problem with the law per se, but I don't have a mask and couldn't go outside to buy one from the shops.

I spent the last 2 weeks emailing McGowan asking him how I was meant to go shopping when I didn't have a mask. His assistant/s simply did a copy & paste response telling me to go to the covid website. I had already checked the website and the answer wasn't there so I sent him another email asking the same question and pointing out the fact I had checked the covid website but it did not have the answer. Hence the reason I was asking him. I got another copy & paste to go to the covid website.

This went on for the last 2 weeks with me emailing him asking how I was meant to go shopping and buy food when I didn't have a mask and couldn't get one. I got nothing but the stupid copy & paste covid website.

Yesterday I had enough and sent an email saying "if you lot copy & paste that stupid covid19 link and don't answer my question, I swear to god I will snap." I then proceeded to tell the premier that I had been out of food for the last week and had numerous health issues and urgently needed to go shopping. I got a copy & paste response to visit the covid website.

That was it, I did my fuplie nut. I ripped into him and told him my blood was on his hands and he had killed me, amongst other things. I lost it and really got stuck into him. I have heart and lung problems and diabetes and haven't eaten properly since covid started last year and my health is going downhill really fast now because I can't exercise or eat right.

That was yesterday and I never got a response, until today when I was woken up by the cops bashing windows in and yelling my name. I spent today talking to cops and shrinks and ambos (paramedics), and god knows who else. They had some concerns about my last email to the premier and wanted to know what was wrong. I told them I was starving and couldn't go to the shop because I didn't have a mask. I told them about my health issues and said I didn't want anyone in the house and I sure as hell wasn't going to the hospital.

I spent the day talking to these people and they seemed understanding but didn't really do anything to help. The police shrink said he was going to get me some help to find a place to live and get me some counselling but time will tell. The ambos did some tests and said my heart rate was 140 beats per minute and they had concerns about me not eating due to the diabetes and other issues. I said 140 beats is good exercise for my ticker. I tried to tell them I didn't care anymore and would be dead in a few years anyway, and probably sooner than that if I get kicked out of the property when it's sold in March.

The ambos eventually left and more cops rocked up. My neighbours are probably more concerned now than ever. Cop cars parked all over the place, ambulance, people going all over the place. :)

Anyway, later this afternoon when more cops arrived, the original cop said he would go to the shop and buy me some food. I gave him some money and said I need some canned fish and rice crackers. I told him what brand and size I wanted. He zipped off to the shop while the other cops and police shrink questioned me. The shrink kept going on about having things to live for and I told him straight out, I have no family or friends and everyone I care about is dead. I am in constant pain due to my back and neck being crushed when I was hit by a car 30 years ago. And I told him about coughing up blood at night when trying to lay down to sleep. He still went on about trying to be positive so I told him about the house being sold, me becoming homeless when that happens, and not being able to buy anything to eat because I don't have a face mask.

The shrink went on about my last email to the premier and how it was rather offensive and abusive. I told him I had been writing to the premier since he got into power in 2017 and he hadn't answered one letter. Not a single piece of correspondence. The shrink said well if you wrote to him like you did in the last email, it's no wonder he hasn't responded. I told the shrink my original early letters were very polite and if the premier had answered just one letter, we wouldn't be here now. He said he was going to look at the other emails and letters. Like big fuplie deal.

The shrink left and the original cops came back with some food for me. I had asked for 6 packs of biscuits and 24 cans of fish. I got 2 packs of biscuits and 24 cans of fish, but it was the wrong fish. What do you say to a cop who has spent most of his day trying to stop you killing yourself and you losing the plot because the dickhead premier had enacted a law that prevented you going outside without a face mask, when the cop gets the wrong food?
I said thank you.

The cops gave me a couple of face masks and said you can go shopping now. Alas I cant go shopping until next Thursday night when there are fewer people at the shop. The shop is crawling with people during the normal day time shopping so I only go out late on Thursday night when they have no or very few customers.

In addition to that, the face masks are not sealed up in plastic and can't be washed. So I have 2 new masks that can't be cleaned and I cant wear them because they might be contaminated by something. And I have some food but it's the wrong food.

Time to go down to the highway and step out in front of a truck.
 
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I just read your story, Colin, and my immediate thought when all those people showed up was, "Hm, I wonder why they didn't just give you some masks."

So, why not wear the disposable facemask just once, and go somewhere where you can buy some better masks. Then you're good to go. Seems pretty simple. Sure, it might not be sterile, but wearing it once seems less of a risk than starving yourself, aggravating your diabetes, and/or incurring the wrath of law enforcement.

Failing that, surely there is someone--social services, a church, a fraternal organization, the girl scouts--whom you could ask for help?

If you're worried about the health implications of wearing a non-sterile mask, or going shopping with other people around, then stepping in front of a truck strikes me as a rather inconsistent idea, too. I advise against it.
 
@Colin_T you have family right here that care about you. I donā€™t have to tell you that you have sunken into a deep, dark depression. Wear the frickinā€™ paper mask just to buy a washable mask. Then get your donkeyā€™s behind out for some fresh air and exercise. Stop this rut youā€™re in. Make a walk part of your daily routine. Even if itā€™s just to a chair outdoors to breathe some air. Itā€™s hard, Iā€™ve been there. Just put one foot in front of the other and do it. Eventually, youā€™ll feel better. Make a plan. Start looking for possible housing. Donā€™t wait for it all to crumble on top of you. Stay ahead of it. Youā€™re a smart man. You can do this! We care and want the best for you. ā¤ļø??ā¤ļø
 
@Colin_T you have family right here that care about you. I donā€™t have to tell you that you have sunken into a deep, dark depression. Wear the frickinā€™ paper mask just to buy a washable mask. Then get your donkeyā€™s behind out for some fresh air and exercise. Stop this rut youā€™re in. Make a walk part of your daily routine. Even if itā€™s just to a chair outdoors to breathe some air. Itā€™s hard, Iā€™ve been there. Just put one foot in front of the other and do it. Eventually, youā€™ll feel better. Make a plan. Start looking for possible housing. Donā€™t wait for it all to crumble on top of you. Stay ahead of it. Youā€™re a smart man. You can do this! We care and want the best for you. ā¤ļø??ā¤ļø
+1 to the above, well said
 
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Don't let me use the flupie "e" word! Listen to your friends here. We care about you!
 
@Colin_T
I agree with what @Deanasue is saying - she's a nurse and is talking sense here. I also agree with @WhistlingBadger - use the mask that you have and and then go out and buy the type of reusable mask you want. And get yourself a phone for emergencies and to be able to contact the authorities. Don't do anything rash. Things will eventually improve. Think positive.
 
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I'm not wearing a mask that isn't safe to wear. There were literally dozens of people outside yesterday and the masks aren't sealed in plastic. If I catch any virus (cold, flu or covid) I am dead. It's that simple. My health is stuffed and isn't getting better. My heart is fuplied and the lungs aren't working enough to help me go to the toilet which is 10 feet from my chair. My health issues aren't getting better and never will. I have had constant back pain and headaches for over 30 years and the pain gets worse. It doesn't get better, it just gets worse. People complain about having a migraine for a few hours, I have had one for the last 30 years. I can't tolerate bright light, loud noise, strong smells. Pain killers don't work and haven't worked since I was hit by the car. I can't breath properly, I can't exercise, I can't get food.

As for going into a phone store, I can't go anywhere there are people in case I catch a virus. And the phone stores are only open during the day and are both located in the middle of a shopping centre full of people. I can't buy anything online because everyone wants a mobile phone number to create an online shopping account.

It would be a different story if I had a reason to live but I don't. My health issues are getting worse and there is no cure for any of the things affecting me. So unless someone can get me a new body, it's only a matter of time before this one completely craps itself and I die.
 
Oh, Colin. I donā€™t know what to say. It sounds like youā€™ve already given up. I am praying for you. I ask God to give you the strength to fight and not give up. In Jesusā€™ Holy name. Amen
 
We are all broken, @Colin_T . And as we get older it gets worse. We can choose to dwell on it or adapt and find other ways to cope and have a life. I hope you do not give up. If all the good wishes from TTF were to overtake your town, it will be the biggest tsunami in Australian history.
 

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